“the best way to honour the memory of Jo Cox and to bring this country together is, I think, to get Brexit done.”
“absolutely ridiculous that people should choose to go around looking like letter boxes”
“It is said that the Queen has come to love the Commonwealth, partly because it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of flag-waving picaninnies; and one can imagine that Blair, twice victor abroad but enmired at home, is similarly seduced by foreign politeness. They say he is shortly off to the Congo. No doubt the AK47s will fall silent, and the pangas will stop their hacking of human flesh, and the tribal warriors will all break out in Watermelon smiles to see the big white chief touch down in his big white British taxpayer-funded bird.”
“The only reason I wouldn’t go to some parts of New York is the real risk of meeting Donald Trump.”
“My ideal world is, we’re there, we’re in the EU, trying to make it better.”
“I am supporting David Cameron purely out of cynical self-interest.”
“Nothing you say will convince me that Americans have a clue how to make a decent sports car.”
“The best fate for Africa would be if the old colonial powers, or their citizens, scrambled once again in her direction; on the understanding that this time they will not be asked to feel guilty.”
“If gay marriage was OK – and I was uncertain on the issue – then I saw no reason in principle why a union should not be consecrated between three men, as well as two men, or indeed three men and a dog.”
“Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3.”
“You know, £60m I saw was being spaffed up a wall on some investigation into historic child abuse.”